the solution to wedding guest outfit burnout

opting out of the Reformation industrial complex, part two

Last year, I documented my wedding guest dress journey in a post called ‘rejecting the Reformation industrial complex’—still my most popular post of all time. A year later, I found myself in a very familiar position: another wedding to attend, and another minor spiral over what to wear. Unlike last time, this wedding wasn’t black tie, which gave me a bit more flexibility. Though I did finally get my own wedding dress dyed, I didn’t feel comfortable wearing it to this wedding as a guest (felt disrespectful to the bride, who was in attendance at my wedding, even though I’m sure she wouldn’t have cared!).

My own taste in formalwear remains largely the same as it did the last time I wrote about wedding guest dressing, but this time I was working with a few additional constraints. One was that I stopped taking an acne medication (spironolactone, a miracle drug) late last year. The result has been (surprise!) the return of chest and back acne with a vengeance, which in turn has led me to favor clothing that covers my chest, back, and shoulders whenever possible. (There is probably an essay in me about how much my early to mid-twenties style was shaped by this same factor.) So for this wedding, I effectively ruled out anything sleeveless, backless, or low-cut—which left me with even fewer options than I’d usually consider.

I scoured the RealReal for possibilities, and felt deeply meh about everything I was seeing that was both in my price range and my preferred silhouette specifications. At a certain point, I thought, “Why don’t I just do an evening jacket and a skirt?” And with that, a whole new world of formalwear opened up. (FYI, if you’re looking for matching set inspo, Viv Chen recently wrote about matching silk sets as wedding outfits here, and wore an envy-inducing one from a British indie designer!)

Then the idea evolved further… instead of a matching set, what if I mixed and matched? Two separate pieces, both in bold colors. (Color inspiration immediately came to mind—Jessie Buckley’s Oscars look and this Rosie Assoulin dress that I’ve lusted after on the RealReal for years.)

I wanted a glamorous statement jacket—perhaps blazer-adjacent, if not a blazer. Structured silk, rather than slinky (I’d save the slinkiness for the skirt). I started with red, and quickly found a vintage silk evening jacket on Depop from the German label Trixi Schober, complete with a dramatic flounced collar.

Once I had the top, I started thinking about what color might work with it. Was I into the bubblegum pink that Jessie Buckley had paired with a similar shade of red? Ultimately, that felt too saccharine for my taste. Purple with red skewed too royal, orange was too intense, green—immediately disqualified on Christmas grounds, white—out for obvious reasons… eventually, I landed on powder blue.

For the skirt’s silhouette, I wanted something tighter, stretchier, and slinkier to contrast with the oversized flounciness of the collar. I only filtered for “blue,” because I knew the exact shade I wanted could be described a dozen different ways. After some searching, I found a beautiful pale blue silk skirt from Gérard Darel on Depop, topped with a sheer beaded overlay. Lined in silk, too!

But when the skirt arrived, it was way more nude than blue (see below). Pretty, but not what I was looking for. So I decided to dye it.

I stood in front of the clothing dye selection at Michael’s, browsing the Rit website, but was too overwhelmed by the sheer amount of color formulas to make a choice in that moment. I ended up buying four colors of dye and returning the two I didn’t use. (I kept royal blue and hyacinth.) Once I’d decided on the color, I used the Rit website and some YouTube guidance to calculate my dye to water ratio (I used a tiny bit less dye than recommended, figuring I could always make it darker if needed.) I also added a cup of vinegar—recommended for silk—and a teaspoon of dish detergent, which is supposed to help with even dyeing. Then I used cooking tongs to swirl it around for ten minutes. Look how much lighter the water is at the end after removing the skirt!

I was happy with the result in the end (see below for the before and after). Once the skirt dried, it ended up being a tiny bit lighter than it looks in the after photo.

I considered taking in the jacket at the sides; however, at this point I had no time to take it to the tailor, and didn’t want to mess it up by attempting it on my own. So I just kept it oversized, and figured I would be in motion or seated the majority of the time I was wearing it.

Here is the final fit! (The photo is a recreation because there was no mirror in the place we were staying.)

The best part is…now I can rewear both of these items separately! I’ll probably pair the jacket with the same red shoes and a pair of jeans for a less fancy night out, or with my new brown wool pants for something slightly fancier and more fall/winter-appropriate. I think the skirt would look chic with a crisp white button-up, in a Sharon Stone at the 1992 Oscars kind of way.

If you are interested in an outfit of silk separates for your next fancy occasion, I have many suggestions for you below. (All secondhand, of course.)

Teri Jon by Rickie Freeman mint green blazer (16), $100; Lafayette 148 beige blazer (12), $42; Teri Jon by Rickie Freeman butter yellow blazer (14), $53; Akris orange blazer (FR 44), $68; Armani Collezioni red/orange short-sleeve jacket (L), $67; Emanuel by Emanuel Ungaro red evening jacket (XL), $44; Lafayette 148 pink blazer (12), $45; Escada pink blazer (DE 44), $84.

Lafayette 148 deep teal evening jacket (16), $70 (and here in a 4 for $28); Teri Jon by Rickie Freeman powder blue blazer (2), $53; Lafayette 148 navy puff sleeve evening jacket (4), $50; Giorgio Armani powder blue blazer (IT 38), $70; Marisa Baratelli three-quarter sleeve cobalt blue top (M), $56; J. Peterman navy evening jacket (L), $90.

From left to right: Anine Bing burgundy skirt (S), $140; Naeem Khan red skirt (14), $147; Christopher Esber orange skirt (XS), $78; forte_forte yellow skirt (XS), $196; Reformation dusty green skirt (6), $95; LaLigne green skirt (S), $132; Anine Bing blue skirt (S), $132, Christopher Esber purple skirt (UK 4), $67; Fleur du Mal periwinkle skirt (XS), $130; Reformation lavender skirt (8), $157; LoveShackFancy pink skirt (L), $75.

And if you’re looking to branch out (slightly!) with some pattern, I also love these pieces. (I’ve included this off-white jacket because it’s beautiful, but out of everything here, that may be the one piece that isn’t typical wedding-appropriate.)

From left to right: Batsheva skirt (14), $108; Valentino Miss V evening jacket (L), $117; Alix of Bohemia skirt (S), $189; Rickie Freeman jacket (4), $48; Dosa skirt (L), $176; Albino Teodoro evening jacket (L), $38.

Below are a few different ways I’d style some of the pieces. I used Maryam Nassir Zadeh shoes for all three outfits because that’s been the only brand of heels I’ve worn in the last few years and have deemed sufficiently comfortable.

Staud handbag, $159; Maryam Nassir Zadeh sandals (IT 36), $116.

Maryam Nassir Zadeh platform sandals (IT 37), $193; Clare V. ponyhair clutch, $156.

Maryam Nassir Zadeh mesh slides (IT 39), $124; Whiting & Davis chainmail bag, $72.

Happy wedding guesting! May you remain free from the Reformation industrial complex!