the perfect wedding guest bag
and the Pavlovian response it should evoke
I briefly entertained the title “going-out bags” here, so apply as you wish, but it turns out that the most frequent occasions when I need a “going-out” bag are in fact weddings. I’m likely: a) not in my own city, where it is normal to show up to pretty much any event with a coffee-stained New Yorker tote, b) wearing a dress or a suit that also doesn’t work as well with a free cloth bag, and c) I don’t need room for a book (sigh.) This is a type of purchase I have dismissed in the past as frivolous or unnecessary, only to find myself ruining an otherwise perfect outfit by lugging a giant slouchy bag around on one shoulder.
The perfect wedding guest bag should be: structured leather, any color except for brown (can’t articulate this but feel very strongly about it), small enough that you can not fit a book inside, and should have a strap or handle of some sort. It should not be drawstring or something complicated to close. Most importantly, it should not be a $7,000 Chanel basketball on a chain that looks like a bag but is in fact only a basketball. (Any Selling Sunset fans out there?)
Ideally, you will not use this bag a lot. Instead, it should evoke a Pavlovian response whenever you take it out—I am going to wear gold eyeshadow! I am going to have fun! I am going to toast someone with champagne!
I owned this boxy blue leather COS bag (an unsolicited and perfect gift from my aunt) for years, and have recently misplaced it, much to my dismay. The only other small bag I own that fits these qualifications is my white leather Staud Ronnie bag (here’s a light pink one on Poshmark, $156) from the RealReal, that I wore not as a guest but as an active participant in a wedding (mine) last year.
Behold, a myriad of options for you (and me) to choose from!
Clockwise from top left: red Opening Ceremony bag $84, red 3.1 Phillip Lim bag $113, white Carolina Santo Domingo bag $140, red Marge Sherwood bag $125, dark dark brown (almost black! so it’s fine) Staud bag $203, red/orange Sophie Hulme bag $124, white Yuzefi bag $98, black Lancel bag $59.
Clockwise from top left: blue Hereu bag $148, purple Yuzefi bag $118, blue Staud bag $168, green Staud bag $118, peach Senreve bag $140, purple Elena Ghisellini bag $148 (the scrunchie detail is genius—see the same bag in white below in the Poshmark listing for how it’s supposed to be worn), another green Staud bag $168.
COS black square leather bag, $85
Mansur Gavriel double zip bag, $125
Staud pink patent leather bucket bag $150
Staud black patent leather bucket bag, $100
Staud crochet bag (this is not leather, and definitely is more of a summer bag, but I cannot resist fruit!), $105
Elena Ghisellini white scrunchie bag, $150
COS leather circle bag, $99
COS silver waist bag, $55
And the depop finds:
Staud lilac bag, $79
Staud teal bag, $105
Staud pale pink bag, $77
Okay, and one non-secondhand one that I can’t resist because it looks like cotton candy! (JW Anderson Purple & Blue Nano Bumper Moon Bag, $83)
How to search: if you’re not looking for anything specific but you want to know that the brands and condition were vetted by an outside party, the RealReal is probably the best place for this. I usually just search for “leather” and then rule out a lot with the other filters (particularly colors, especially if you’re not looking for black or brown.) If you notice yourself gravitating towards any particular brands, that will make searching on Poshmark/depop/other self-sale platforms easier.
Thanks for reading!
<3 E