I too am an archivist when it comes to keepsakes that tell a story about a loved one. I learned to do this after losing my grandparents (but getting to read all of their precious old postcards) and losing my brother (while getting to revisit the moments we shared anytime I like on Facebook and IG, which were just getting started then). Now I keep every card my son has made me, as well as all the little drawings and lists that I've made for him. I imagine him one day having to wake up without me, and I want my archive to be full to bursting, there to remind him of how gigantically he was loved while I lived, and how loved he remains.
On a more personal note, I am so sorry for your loss, Eleanor. The old friends and beaus we have from our younger years are themselves an archive of our memories. We lose a piece of ourselves when we lose them. The world loses a piece of its own memory. And of course, the ones closest to them lose the most. Not only do we not get to touch them or kiss them or ask them what they think about things, we also lose a library, a museum, a priceless monument to everything that mattered to us both.
This is really lovely. Thanks for sharing your memories w/ us (& making the case for continuing to preserve our own!). If only there were an affordable way to preserve/digitize a steamer trunk full of 20 years of journals…😵💫
My suspicion over your blog name has been confirmed now that I’ve seen your Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins ticket! I knew it! (Love that album).
I take so many pictures of me and my friends! We lost a dear friend to cancer at the start of the pandemic, and I was the one who memorialized her in photos, going back to 1996, when we met.
Archives forever, Eleanor.💕 I’m sorry for your loss.
Your post reminds me of the “Eulogy” episode from Black Mirror! I’m an inconsistent archivist and often don’t remember to take photos but I’m realizing more and more how fallible memory is and how important these artefacts are to preserving personal (and familial) stories.
I loved this post. I’m also a huge supporter of the personal archive. As a former archaeologist, delving into archives was a huge part of my job (and as the director of a historical society, it still is!)—there is something so incredible and humbling about the private moments captured forever, particularly the quotidien ones.
I regret that I don't have an archive documenting my outfits from 2001 - 2012 when I was young and stylish in New York. I let go of so much over the years without much thought, but I wish I at least had photographs to prove to my daughter that I was cool and glamorous once upon a time. I found some really fabulous vintage finds thrifting in the 90s that I wish I had a record of now, like the 70s seafoam green trench coat with extra wide cuffs and lapels, or the 70s aquamarine leather trench coat--lots of memorable outerwear, now that I think about it. 😄 Back in the early aughts, before smart phones, my only reference of someone documenting their wardrobe was Cher in Clueless taking polaroid snapshots.
Keep an archive, but also do your descendents a favor by purging most of it before you die. I have therapy clients who are buried under the ephemera of dead relatives and who feel guilty parting with it even though it holds no memories for them.
I too am an archivist when it comes to keepsakes that tell a story about a loved one. I learned to do this after losing my grandparents (but getting to read all of their precious old postcards) and losing my brother (while getting to revisit the moments we shared anytime I like on Facebook and IG, which were just getting started then). Now I keep every card my son has made me, as well as all the little drawings and lists that I've made for him. I imagine him one day having to wake up without me, and I want my archive to be full to bursting, there to remind him of how gigantically he was loved while I lived, and how loved he remains.
How wonderful that you’re able to do that for your son — and a reminder of the foresight that loss can give us.
On a more personal note, I am so sorry for your loss, Eleanor. The old friends and beaus we have from our younger years are themselves an archive of our memories. We lose a piece of ourselves when we lose them. The world loses a piece of its own memory. And of course, the ones closest to them lose the most. Not only do we not get to touch them or kiss them or ask them what they think about things, we also lose a library, a museum, a priceless monument to everything that mattered to us both.
This is really lovely. Thanks for sharing your memories w/ us (& making the case for continuing to preserve our own!). If only there were an affordable way to preserve/digitize a steamer trunk full of 20 years of journals…😵💫
I’m sorry that you lost your friend. ❤️I hope you encounter more fun memories with him in the days and months to come.
Thanks, Jessie!
My suspicion over your blog name has been confirmed now that I’ve seen your Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins ticket! I knew it! (Love that album).
I take so many pictures of me and my friends! We lost a dear friend to cancer at the start of the pandemic, and I was the one who memorialized her in photos, going back to 1996, when we met.
Archives forever, Eleanor.💕 I’m sorry for your loss.
She’s my favorite singer! I feel lucky that I’ve been able to see her live for almost twenty years now. So glad you have those photos of your friend 💙
Your post reminds me of the “Eulogy” episode from Black Mirror! I’m an inconsistent archivist and often don’t remember to take photos but I’m realizing more and more how fallible memory is and how important these artefacts are to preserving personal (and familial) stories.
I’ll have to watch it! I’m so bad with ‘dark’ television … happy to read the most depressing fiction and nonfiction but I struggle to watch Serious TV
Go forth and document your life! It’s the memories and the photos that we’re left with in the end after all!
❤️❤️❤️Lots of you in my archive
❤️❤️❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss!
I loved this post. I’m also a huge supporter of the personal archive. As a former archaeologist, delving into archives was a huge part of my job (and as the director of a historical society, it still is!)—there is something so incredible and humbling about the private moments captured forever, particularly the quotidien ones.
Former archaeologist and current historical society director?! What a cool career path! (Side note—what historical society?)
Totally forgot to respond to this one!! And yes it's definitely been an interesting career path :) I'll DM you!
I regret that I don't have an archive documenting my outfits from 2001 - 2012 when I was young and stylish in New York. I let go of so much over the years without much thought, but I wish I at least had photographs to prove to my daughter that I was cool and glamorous once upon a time. I found some really fabulous vintage finds thrifting in the 90s that I wish I had a record of now, like the 70s seafoam green trench coat with extra wide cuffs and lapels, or the 70s aquamarine leather trench coat--lots of memorable outerwear, now that I think about it. 😄 Back in the early aughts, before smart phones, my only reference of someone documenting their wardrobe was Cher in Clueless taking polaroid snapshots.
Keep an archive, but also do your descendents a favor by purging most of it before you die. I have therapy clients who are buried under the ephemera of dead relatives and who feel guilty parting with it even though it holds no memories for them.